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Thursday, January 23, 2014

Attacks on Wendy Davis of Texas are nothing more than junior high behavior exhibited by grown men

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Political Misogyny Is Thriving Quite Nicely
By Carol Morgan, January 23, 2014

Make it stop. Please.

The last three days have been a wicked carnival of heinous comments about Wendy Davis and her biography. They’re now calling it Trailergate, isn’t that cute?

Look, there’s no harm in discussing the cracks in her biography, but media politico-males have taken it to a dark level of shameless attacks, bordering on misogyny and harassment. The online comments that followed after the slut-shaming-language began were more horrible than you can imagine.

These gentlemen (what a misnomer!) remind me of pimply-faced junior high boys at the back of a classroom; taunting, bullying, snickering and giggling, and high-fiving, encouraging each other to ramp up the volume of audacity. It seemed to be some sort of he-man competition to determine who could make the most revolting statement. All of it was done at the expense of Wendy Davis and her family.

Read the article at Progress Texas about the top ten worst comments that Conservatives made about Wendy Davis: Top Ten Worst Comments Made by Conservatives About Wendy Davis

There are no words to describe my disgust at these comments, especially Robert Stacy McCain, who flippantly remarked that she is a “cheap, dishonest, two-timing floozy”.

I suggest that these men should repeat their off-color performances to an audience of their own wives and daughters. And let’s add their mothers to that group also! It’s a sure way to make Mom proud of you!

Of course, everyone sees this for what it really is: A desperately transparent tactic of intimidation and humiliation by Conservative men, but that’s an issue for another blog.

While you’re thinking about it, read columnist Lisa Faulkenberg’s outstanding comeback in the Houston Chronicle at: Falkenberg: Politics tries to twist Davis' story into lies

To be fair, this is not just a Democratic woman problem. It’s happened to women in both political parties. In the past, we’ve witnessed the same type of degradation and shaming from men on both sides of the aisle. The same sexist ugliness occurred when Sarah Palin was tapped as McCain’s running mate. I recall one media-male that remarked, “What we really want to know is this: Does she spit or swallow?”

Shameful…disgusting…

I don’t care if a woman is a Democrat or Republican. This should NOT be happening.

We witnessed the same treatment in Republican Nikki Haley’s gubernatorial campaign when legends of her torrid private sex life emerged, simply because she donned a pair of stiletto heels. We’ve seen the sexual orientation of powerful women like Hillary Clinton and Janet Napolitano questioned. We pay more attention to women’s fashion choices than to their messages, while men’s clothing, hair styles, and footwear escape the same scrutiny.

We see double standards.

A divorced mom who relinquishes custody to the father is viewed as a bad mother, but a father who does the same is merely “ambitious”. He supposedly makes personal sacrifices for the welfare of the children. If a woman has a wealthy or powerful husband then her success is attributed to him, rather than her individual efforts and accomplishments. She must have piggy-backed off his success; she couldn’t have possibly made it on her own! On the other hand, a woman who’s single, widowed or divorced is accused of employing her womanly assets to get ahead.

If a woman makes others laugh, she’s accused of sarcasm. If an assertive woman gets things done, she’s automatically labeled as “bossy”. All of these traits are lauded in a man...need I say more?

No matter what women do, they can never win in the eyes of their male counterparts.

If you think this is only a problem in America or Texas, think again. It thrives quite nicely in Lubbock, Texas.

Gender bias, shaming, sexual innuendos, and humiliation—all of it has gone on for years in our local government, in business circles and the local media. If a woman attempts to make an influence in business, politics, or policy-making in Lubbock County, they’d better be prepared to adhere to the West Texas stereotype of womanhood and more importantly, know their place, which is always beneath the man, both figuratively and literally.

Look back over the personnel history and changes within the City of Lubbock and the gender representation of the Lubbock City Council. Reflect over the last twenty years. Think of the women who’ve held executive positions in city government: Wendy Sitton, Anita Burgess, or Lee Ann Dumbauld. Each of these women was unrelentingly attacked by male members of the governmental body. The situation became so unbearable that Ms. Burgess relocated to another municipality and several men beat the war drums until Ms. Dumbauld was terminated. I have NO DOUBT whatsoever that unconscious gender bias had a role in these incidents.   

Cultural, ethnic, racial and gender bias is so ingrained and subconscious in all of us that it persists without  being recognized, but it’s crystal clear to outside observers through the communication of body language and literal language.  

No one bears the scars more than an outspoken, hard-working woman who devoted several years to the City Council and the Lubbock School Board. She did so much for this community and was relentless attacked by men in our community, until the only respite came from moving out of Lubbock.

A very gracious and attractive self-made business woman was elected to the City Council in the late 90’s, but declined to seek another term because of the continual insults and verbal assaults on her intelligence, as if being attractive and bright cannot exist in the same body.

When our female Mayor Pro-Tem was forced to act as Mayor in early 2013, she was ridiculed and laughed at by a certain local radio station whose amusement is regularly fueled at the expense of other people’s dignity. It’s nothing more than junior high behavior exhibited by grown men.

Could this be the reason we have only two women on the Lubbock City Council? Few women would willingly expose themselves to this treatment. An extremely toxic workplace environment exists at the City of Lubbock and it’s certainly not a very well-kept secret.

The kerfuffle of last minute ballot changes by a certain Lubbock female judge is another example of the double standards at work in our city government. While I don’t condone her strategy, other men in Lubbock politics have employed similar tactics and much worse, yet there was such a hue and cry from her own party, you’d think she’d murdered someone. She simply used the good ol’ boy system (which for years, kept her neck under their boot) to her advantage and they did not take to it kindly.  

We have a city attorney who recently referred to his female accuser per “Hell hath no fury like a woman scorned” which was intended to degrade, shame, and intimidate the victim. It was a low blow that didn’t help his case and effectively tarnished his halo.

It is not easy to be a woman in a world that defers to men.

This isn’t just about Wendy Davis. The recent attacks inflicted upon her are merely the tip of the iceberg; the most recent incident among thousands. It’s symbolical of the unreported misogyny that women suffer every single day; simply because of their gender. 

It’s undeserved and an adult version of bullying. We don’t accept this in our schools, so why do we accept in our governing systems, the workplace and the media?

It’s time to disarm this systemic problem. Ladies need to own this situation and make a concerted effort to terminate it. The good news is that you don’t have to slap or slug anyone (although at times, I’m tempted). It just takes a few honest comments to disarm the humiliation, shaming, and guilt.

“I don’t like it when you talk that way (to) (about) me. Could you stop it, please?”

“Are you trying to humiliate me?”

“Is this an attempt to make me feel guilty?”

“Are you trying to make feel ashamed?”

“Would you say that same thing to your mother, your wife, your sister, or your daughter?”

If all of that fails, you have my permission to slug them.

It’s really simple: Women want a chance to accomplish things, just as men do. We’d prefer to do so with a minimum of difficulty or drama.

Make it stop. Please.
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