2013, the "horror show of outlandish dysfunction"

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The 5 worst political villains of 2013

Even in a year defined by political dysfunction, these 5 stood out for being so very awful

By Elias Esquith, December 24, 2013

Another year in politics has come and gone and, wouldn’t you know it, America still has problems! Lots of them, in fact. But while one could spend an eternity cataloguing the many challenges facing the U.S., we opted instead to focus on the five political players who, more than anyone else, were responsible for turning 2013 into such a rolling mess.

So next time you’re trying to figure out who’s to blame for reducing the American experiment of enlightened self-governance into a horror show of outlandish dysfunction, look no further than this here list. We’ve got you covered.

Ted Cruz

Almost from the very first moment he stepped into the Senate, Ted Cruz has been the political equivalent of a wrecking ball. First and foremost among his sins, of course, was October’s failed, disastrous government shutdown, a hideous spectacle, largely orchestrated by Cruz, that sunk Americans’ view of Congress to unprecedented depths, cost billions of dollars in wasted output, and ultimately served no discernible purpose — other than massively raising Ted Cruz’s profile, that is. His 21-hour faux filibuster was a brazenly self-promotional and cynical act — the kind of nihilistic political theater that should make any good-faith observer of politics at least a little queasy. That’s true about most things Ted Cruz does, come to think of it.

Rand Paul

The Kentucky senator and son of Ron Paul earned a lot of credit among civil libertarians and opponents of the national security state with his epic filibuster against the confirmation of John Brennan as CIA director — and then proceeded to fritter all that goodwill away by acting like the right-wing, Ayn Rand-loving crank that he is. Even for a politician, Paul likes to hear himself speak; so it’d be difficult to find one and only one quote from 2013 to lay bare his fundamental radicalism and disinterest in helping working people. That said, his recent comments that ending unemployment insurance for millions of workers would be doing them a favor are representative of his unfortunate combination of ignorance, callousness, and a chilling indifference to the real people on the receiving end of his perverse vision of economic justice.

Ken Cuccinelli

“Cooch,” as his supporters liked to call him, was possibly the only Republican candidate creepy and extreme enough to lose an election to Terry McAuliffe. And lose he did. Cuccinelli’s thankful defeat could be chalked up to his being outspent by McAuliffe, his association with the Tea Party during the government shutdown, or his general lack of charisma. But in all likelihood what really sank “Cooch” was his medieval worldview when it comes to human sexuality. What Wendy Davis is for the pro-choice movement, Ken Cuccinelli is — and more — for anti-choicers everywhere.

John Boehner

Speaker of the House John Boehner is, on his own, far from the worst of the Republican pack. But if 2013 taught us nothing else about John Boehner, it taught us that he cares much more about remaining Speaker of the House than he does about doing what’s right for the country. The same guy who started the year saying the president’s reelection changed the calculus on Obamacare as well as immigration reform went on to spend the majority of 2013…obstructing against Obamacare and immigration reform! His performance during the government shutdown, too, was utterly pathetic and a craven display of personal ambition trumping any cogent sense of the greater good. But, hey, he’s still Speaker; so as far as he’s concerned, 2013 was probably quite all right.

Jim DeMint

The man many consider to be the real intellectual and strategic heavyweight behind the Republican Party, former senator and current Heritage Foundation leader Jim DeMint is second only to Ted Cruz when it comes to responsibility for the government shutdown. Indeed, one could argue that DeMint, Heritage, and Heritage Action (the political arm of the think tank) did more damage to the U.S. government in 2013 than nearly anyone. They were the ones whipping up conservative activists nationwide in the months, weeks, and days leading up to the government shutdown. And the cockamamie notion that Obama would defund his signature achievement rather than let the government shut down? That was DeMint’s idea.

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