"Push your member of Congress to build relationships and get things done for you, your family and our country." It's time to stop the asinine vilification.

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COMMENTS:
*  One thing unmentioned is how much "hot button" issues of morality and lifestyle have become such a significant part of our political scene. Another, is that in some circles, compromise is seen as equivalent to surrender. And then there are the outside groups that have established "scorecards", "litmus tests" and written pledges. A politician will have his voting record scrutinized in minutia, so that even tactical votes that appear "wrong" may be held against the member. What would baseball be like if bunts and sacrifices were deemed unacceptable? All of those factors make it difficult to establish the comity and give and take geniality that the Founders and politicians of earlier eras assumed would make our political system workable.
*  Kind of feel sorry for this guy.. The GOP now a days will Crucify him for even being friendly with Democrats...  Sad commentary of how far my Country has fallen...
*  Build relationships and get things done sounds good, but fat chance when a primary opponent can shank you for fraternizing with the enemy and compromising.
*  The author conveniently leaves out a discussion of why these cross-party meetings are now so rare. Historically, socialization between congressmen from the two parties was quite common, and often facilitated bipartisan compromises.  However, when Gingrich took over the House, he sent out a memo to GOP House members ordering them not to fraternize with "the enemy," because it made it harder to claim that Democrats were evil if the GOP was willing to socialize with them. Put simply, it is harder to vilify someone (and easier to work with them) if you are friends, so ending social contact completely changed the tone of these relationships. This, combined with increased pressure to raise money and to return back to one's home district on the weekend, dramatically reduced socialization.
*  Explains why all conservatives use the same terminology. This is really disgusting and explains why this country is in the mess it's in.
*  They're wonderful people to eat with. .. But politically they are still looking to destroy the country and will still shiv you in the back.
*  I'm glad this article was written and published. The author's right.  The fact that he's no longer in Congress because of a drug conviction doesn't mean he's wrong on this point.  Sure, I'd like it even better if a member without a record had written it, but no one else did. The battle lines are drawn and few if any politicians dare break ranks.  But working with each other across the aisle as fellow human beings who disagree is how policy used to be made, when Washington worked better. Politics is famously the art of compromise and ultimately nothing else works in a democracy.
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What happens when a Republican congressman tries to make Democratic friends
He gets bear-hugged, for starters.
By Trey Radel. February 10, 2016

In New York, money is power. In Washington, relationships are power.

If a member of Congress wants legislation passed, he or she must work the right people. When I served in Congress, I found that most elected members understood that. Unfortunately, most also don’t have relationships with people in the other party.

There’s lots of vitriol on both sides. When I first got to Washington as a Republican, I watched my back wondering, “Is a Democrat going to shank me?” If you listen to enough talk radio from the left or the right, you may think representatives are doing just that. A disdain for the other side pervades. Some members are reserved and aloof; others are cordial but guarded.

Eventually, though, I let my guard down. In my first couple of months in Washington, I made it a point to introduce myself to every Democrat in my Florida delegation. I wanted to meet face to face to let members of the other party know I wasn’t there to call them names or shout them down. Some lawmakers were shocked, saying, “I’ve never had a Republican schedule a meeting, just to meet.” But overall, the reception was good.

One of my first meetings was with the outgoing and friendly Rep. Alcee L. Hastings. It was more like connecting with an old friend than a new colleague. We talked about music, sports and his nearby district. Afterward, we gave each other a man hug. In another brief but friendly meeting, Rep. Kathy Castor and I talked about Tampa, her district, where I have relatives.

Everyone I met was gracious and appreciative. And we never talked about policy. Instead, I focused on some of the commonalities we had, whether it was family, friends or a love of Florida.

One person in particular went above and beyond to build a relationship – Debbie Wasserman Schultz, a Democrat who is absolutely, wholeheartedly and thoroughly despised by Republicans.

All I’d known about the congresswoman going in was her occasional over-the-top rhetoric and liberal political positions. In fact, in my career before Congress, I’d talk smack about her while hosting my talk radio show. After Obamacare was ramrodded through Congress, I ran sound bites from Wasserman Schultz, calling her a “mouthpiece for Democrats.”

About to meet her, I asked myself, “Is she going to shank me?”

Far from it. She was one of the kindest members of Congress. We first met on the House floor, shook hands and sat down next to each other. After talking about lighter things, she struck a more serious tone. “Trey, one of the important things to remember for us, in our own parties, is what happens here,” she paused and looked around, “is different from what happens outside.”

I got it: We have work to do for every American as federal lawmakers, but on the “outside,” campaign rhetoric will always exist and – gasp! – may even occasionally rub people the wrong way.

This reinforced why I made the effort to reach out to Democrats. As members of political parties, we often need to just get over ourselves. Instead of focusing on the occasional bombastic statements and campaign speeches outside of Congress, we need to find commonality on the inside.

Soon after, my tiny bit of effort to meet Democrats turned into one of my best memories in Congress – an invitation to dinner.

Two influential Congress members hold a dinner once a month to bring people from both parties together. One, is Wasserman Schultz; the other is Daniel Webster (Fla.), a highly respected conservative Republican. The dinner is by invitation only, and there was one requirement. I had to invite a guest, and that guest had to be from the opposite party. My guest was Rep. Patrick Murphy, also from Florida.

Dinner was fun and friendly, with about half a dozen people there, including Homeland Security Committee Chairman Michael McCaul (Tex.) and other freshman, such as former congressman Brad Schneider (Ill.). Although it probably would have been super cool to talk about the “doc fix” or other issues sure to put you to sleep, we didn’t. Instead, we chatted about family, friends, our experiences outside of Congress and our home cities.

Unfortunately, events like this are rare. With the demand to raise so much cash, lawmakers often don’t have time to forgo a night of fundraising for dinner. But members of Congress should spend more time together, visiting one another’s districts, getting their families together and even having dinner. Will it lead to a landslide of solutions for immigration, the tax code or foreign policy? Not right away. However, it becomes a lot harder to ignore people or throw shade when you know them personally. Furthermore, it gets us out of our local political echo chamber.

To you reading this now: Your representative faces a Catch-22. If they’re not in the district, they’re not in touch with the people. Unfortunately, if they’re not in D.C., they’re not working on relationships that lead to compromise and solutions. Push your member of Congress to build relationships and get things done for you, your family and our country.
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