New program from the NRA

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New NRA Initiative Aims to Put Lead Back in Paint, Gasoline

In a surprising development, the NRA said this week that not only is it opposing the Center for Biological Diversity's ban on lead in hunting ammo but is also pursuing the return of lead to house paint and vehicle fuel. A spokesman said federal laws in the 1970s that banned leaded gas and lead paint were unconstitutional and an attack on the personal freedom of many gun owners.

According to spokesman Buck Gummint, Jr.: "The Constitution was not written to tell Americans what they can't do. You know I'm right on this. It was written to tell us we can do anything we want. And that includes breathing some toxic fumes. And that includes ingesting toxic materials. So if that gives liberals a little cancer or makes their babies dumb, that's just the cost of doing business. 'Cause I got news for pantywaists and you can quote me: Freedom is not free."

The NRA's new program, which was inaugurated last year with a well-funded campaign to keep lead in hunting ammunition nationwide, is rapidly expanding. Its next freedom-defending projects, Gummint told reporters, will include the repeal of child-seatbelt laws and lifting of bans on the interstate transport of thermonuclear devices.
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